Change takes time

Something I have learned about myself:

Change takes time....

My common M.O. is to go through something- and indeed as those closest to me know my life has brought to me a lot of "somethings"- and to simply pop up and say- "I'm all better now!" and the happier and more cheerful the voice, the better I feel and more I think I have accomplished. I pat myself on the back, I look for my silver lining quickly and I go a long the way.

But in reality, this past year, I have come to embrace the following:

that real change, is painful, it is slow, it is not easy.

Sometimes there is no right answer. Sometimes, you do have to go through more pain and more loneliness and more struggle until you feel better. Because emotions aren't pleasant, and feelings aren't always pretty. Just like WE aren't always supposed to be pleasant or pretty. And we have the right to take our time, to express ourselves and attempt to talk things out, and we have the right to be unpleasant or less than pretty at times.

And it's after you take the time, to feel and to hurt and sort through slowly and mindfully your experiences, that you will wake up one morning and the sun will be shining and you stretch your arms and then you can pop up out of bed and say truly, "wow, I am better, I feel good, and I KNOW WHY"

And it's different because you know why, and you are stronger, and you understand the path that you went down.

And that knowledge and that strength you gained, because you didn't take a short cut with your emotions, that's the real silver lining.